The Cause of Such Humming

A conversation we had

 

Hmmm …

What is the cause of such humming

Thoughts i have a a hard time

pinning down.

Because when i try

they flutter

and buzz

and out comes

 a hmm ….

the Hmm of insect feelings,

feebly attempting to catch them with netting

paper wings static in the wind

waiting

for the beating wings

to match the rhythm of…

A starry-eyed heart

and a

mind too full of “wonderlust”

to get where it wants to go

will it be carried?

Only by the harsh winds of change

a change that is for the better

And I hum a memory…

of small tufts of wishing fluffs and…

gruffs

and love

Hmm…

*snapping

lol

Slightly Forlorn–

–Letters And Spaces

idk just more crap

Messy messy messy

“my life”

I say

Sometimes

same

sometimes i don’t understand what or why i’m feeling

so i guess

i guess maybe if i don’t understand then it’s not for me

they aren’t for me to keep quiet about

if you don’t understand it’s probably meant for someone else

 

maybe you in about ten years

idk idk idk

what

idk what

idk what else i have to say

well i have a lot left to say but i don’t think any of it matters but idk it’ll get crossed out out anyway

 

“hesitant fingerprints”

 

and i revealed and if anyone commented they made sure to use the word

love

but idk

idk idk I DON’T KNOW

WHAT THAT MEANS

 

and i’m no song writer

no poet

no artist

just human 

just like you

so

why don’t you understand

i just

 

i just

 

 

i just want 

 

I just want

 

that’s all i want

 

YES I KNOW

I KNOW AND

I’VE BEEN TOLD

AND I KNOW

that everything happens for a reason

 

that’s why i’m 5’8″ dish water blond brown eyed, starry hearted, and worried about you

there’s a reason why i’m worried about you

…idk what this is about…

 

i guess that’s relatable

 

*cries

for some reason i’m sure

 

and i want to talk to him but

i have sticky lips that catch words like webs

 

and you what are you here for? the poets? the angsty teens? the hopeless romantics? how about the textbook nobodies? well i got news for you

 

we’re 60% water, and 100% less than the dust of the Earth

 

yet

here we are

 

here i am

 

here i am

 

here i am

 

 

here we go

 

 

 

A hoodie and cake [crap poems for me]

*you wish you were as cool as this mermaid and her cat*

 

I bought myself a new hoodie

 

cuz my old one still smells like you

 

and every time those songs come on i don’t know what to do

i couldn’t even listen to Sleeping At Last for a few months after last year

 

I see that necklace

i don’t touch it

i see that picture

…

then i scroll back up

 

i see her face

i hear her name

and feel like someone is watching me

 

i think about the ‘good ol’ days’

that was before         . . .

i can’t look you in the face now

 

not that i ever could

 

i couldn’t back then

 

because i knew

 

and now

. . .

 

i’m buying myself a new hoodie

 

and a chocolate cake

 

Dec. 1, 2017 A4 Creative Writing (Journal Jam)

*insert that journal jam here please*

. . .

Some of my heart

. . .

. . .

more heart

. . .

” Because the underdogs need someone who will always root for them.

And I always will.

Because I believe in fighters, and in the quiet lovers.

The bad test takers, and the sad teachers.

The star-gazers, and the mad preachers.

I believe in the kids on the bleachers.

Because that’s where I am, shouting at the top of my lungs.

 

For the boy who comes into class hoping nobody sees his tears, because men don’t cry.

For the girl who walks the school alone, counting the concrete slabs, as well as her reasons to live.

For the boy who was called gay in elementary school, because he likes flowers, and picks them for his mother.

For the boy who was teased for reading his scriptures.

For the girl who is “too emotional,” because she’s seen a thing or two that you haven’t.

 

I’m shouting for the underdogs

Because I see myself in them.

And we are all unfinished miracles, waiting

For the right moment

To show everyone what we’ve got.

 

And all these underdogs.. Or maybe I should say

Undergods,

Are fighting,

And fighting

And fighting,

For a chance to be recognized as something more

Than a textbook nobody.

 

And I’ll be yelling

Cheering

Shouting

Screaming at the top of my lungs

Because it’s the last quarter, and you’ve given it your all.

And you’re doing great.

 

And you always will. ”  — Letters and Spaces

crying again ❤

crying for the “undergods”.
screaming
praying
that someday
they will see

and maybe maybe someday they will hear

and feel

and know

. . .

Some more of my heart

and some more

. . .

“Angel”

an angel                          on the ground

asleep

with Christmas carols neath her head

and her free range heart beating loud

‘ ‘ come get warm by the fire and leave when you are well rested ‘ ‘

 

she sighs                              and the heavens weep:

one soldier down . . .                                              and

on Earth she roams       Letting whoever needs, to come and go, giving them a glowing bit of love to carry with them

and some say                            she’ll run out

that someday there will not be enough fire to keep her heart warm . . .  “angel”

an angel on the ground

asleep

with Christmas carols neath her head                                          and her free range heart

beating loud

They are lead by the sound … and leave with the love that never dies.

. . .

A letter from my heart?

well

You can’t read what it says

. . .

Content to be

— Slightly Forlorn

 

 

“creative writing stuhff”

“Caught up already?”

“no, but i can’t read for that long”

“because you’re falling asleep?”

“no because i’m too distracted by everything”

“you’re distracted by everything a lot ” *clears throat

…. }:l

“and what are you doing over there?”

….   “creative writing stuhff”

 

I’m not sure what I mean

the colored wax will leave a mark.

its fine its fine

you can paint over it

 

. . .

 

 

 

 

no i’m not sure what that means either.

+ –

There’s nothing wrong with tear stains

Nothing wrong with glossy wet eyes.

Don’t worry if someone sees you.

if someone can’t see you cry

then they can’t really see you laugh either.

 

 

mmmg

there’s something in my bones

its marrow

and the memory of you

 

…

“pour a little salt

we were never here”

My Winter Song

Cold frozen land . . . the sky takes pity and sends me a snowflake. I love it so much it sends me a blizzard. And I walk though the silent world as the snow falls thick . . . I pass over the river as it starts to get dark, and I’m led home by warm glowing street lamps, followed by thousands of foot prints … hundreds … a few . . . I trudge up the front steps and shake snow off as I go, taking my boots and coat off on my porch before I go in. They perch in the bathroom to dry off . . . Sparks … a glow … a flame … I pile up some more wood then start some water boiling in a pot. I gently break off the rest of my frozen shell and take a quick shower . . . My favorite slippers and an old recipe. I finish my dinner and open my scriptures; time to feast . . . God smiles wider and tells the sky to keep sending snow. I fall asleep to psalms. Angels sit around me conversing with my weary spirit . . . frost work begins to grow and glisten on the windows. A charred log slips and I stir. Drowsy eyes watch the glinting frost ferns … then close.

just saying

Well

I mean nelson said i was different once upon a time

and

ya.

I was gonna make a video but

haha

that takes too long

I’ll post it in like ten years when it’s done so

stay tuned ya know?